18.10.10

God in fb

"You can tell yourself that you have already decided, that nothing now can stop you, but if that step backwards is so much safer than that step forwards, what will hold you true to your path when the going gets tough? Sometimes, the right thing to do is to take that first irreversible step, the one after which you cannot go back. And now, for you, is one of those times." 


fine things


fine things are unimportant,
relationships are.


17.10.10

Bla Bla Bla on LOVE

Dear Love,

Please don't give up on me. I need you now more than ever. Help me realize that you are eternal; that a thing as beautiful, as precious, as strong and yet as fragile as you is bound to face even the toughest storm at some point in your life.

Teach me to never falter in my faith that you, Love, make the weak, strong and the blind see again. You make miracles possible. Rekindle the dwindling fire of hope in those about to give up on you in their search for True Love.  

Encourage me to seek you not only in my times of sorrow and despair but to rejoice and recognize your work in my moments of joy and happiness with the one I love.

Show me how to love without question, to forgive with condition, to trust without even a shade of doubt. Teach my heart that love is never measured by flowers, or chocolates, or fancy dinner dates nor by expensive jewelries but it is only seen and felt by the heart, those what you call little acts of love.

Strengthen my faith in God, my dear Love, because it is through Him that I have found and felt your amazing presence. Remind me always that God is love and you are that of God's. It was He who made everything possible.

Distance, different timezones, and difficulties in communication are not hindrances for me to experience you but should rather be a clear reminder on how true love conquers the odds, how powerful love is no matter what the circumstances are.

Lastly, if you, Love, choose to put an end to what I have now, may you gently remind me that true and genuine love doesn't cease to exist with one failed relationship. You have my best interests at heart no matter how confusing and painful it gets. Teach me to never give up on you.

Let me feel your depth and let me soar high beyond the skies of love. Make me feel human. Make me feel alive. Teach my heart to be always grateful to have you, pure and untainted love, by my side.  

~xoxo~

14.10.10

Go Sailing Where?

"I am the master of my fate, the captain of my soul."
-William Ernest Henley-


I know.
I've started building my ship long ago.
Everything's set to go.
My ship is ready.
The captain is eager to set sail.
The problem is, I still don't have a map.
The map that would lead me to Paradise Island,
wherever that may be.

Speak, Lord.
I am listening.

13.10.10

Lost Pirates @ Port Bellfleur


I may be trapped but this time, I am smiling.
:)

12.10.10

Monday Joy

I don't really look forward to Mondays. Not until today.

I was worried sick all weekend or maybe even got a little paranoid. I didn't care anymore if he remembers  or not what (special) day it was, all I wanted was to receive just a little paramdam from him. To let me know that he's okay. I heard from him after almost three days and that very very short chat calmed my restless heart, it was to me the perfect monthsary gift even if we're miles apart - TIME. I was thankful he gave me that amidst his busy life.

But this time the start of my week wasn't just another ordinary, boring, sedentary Monday. I wouldn't be sitting in front of the computer or be sleeping most of the time until I'm about to have pressure sores. haha. Today I was able to walk for miles under the glorious heat of the sun without getting tired (only to find out that the library is close, i didn't care though); feel the cool wind brush against my skin; talk as in really talk, with my voice coming out of my mouth, with human beings other than my dad. 

I don't even remember when was the last time I really talked that much and listened too. What  we had wasn't the usual chika you get when you get to see someone after a very long time. It was an exchange of ideas, of hopes, of dreams and of fears which I could only do with someone I'm really comfortable with. It was for me a momentous moment. Probably a start of something new. An adventure I am embarking on as I slowly open myself to others in a new place away from home. I felt a little less lonely. I'm excited for the days to come.

Thank you Joy for this day.
You are my Monday Joy. :)

11.10.10

I'm On a High


Thank you
for fixing my broken wings and
for soaring high with me on the skies of love.

And if by fate you'll find your way to this blog, I hope you won't get mad at me for posting our picture. I know we've never really been public about our relationship, well, except for our facebook statuses that is but I think Peter Pan needs a little publicity, you know. All the other male disney characters (Prince Charming bla bla) are so overrated.
Oh. By the way, that's my Peter Pan on the picture. *wink 

8.10.10

What's Outside Your Window

Here's mine.

I took this a couple of days ago when never never land was being punished by Zeus coz I lost my bet against Peter Pan in the ateneo vs feu championship game. That's why you guys are having a sunny weather back there.

I thought being sent to never never land was a punishment I would have to serve for a million lightyears; that I am doomed to be miserable and sad forever. Then I realized after looking at this picture that no matter where I am now, no matter how hard life can get, there is still beauty and happiness. All I need to do is to look within myself and use my heart to look beyond the horizon.

I am no expert when it comes to tackling life's hardest issues, hell, I even suck at it. But come to think of it, the torture you need to go through in school, the pain of working your ass off for a salary just enough for your daily fare, the agony of being unemployed and being stuck at home every single day - all of these make us feel human. We stumble and fall in our pursuit for happiness but what's important is that we rise everytime we fall with our chin held high and with a smile on our face.

We always think that getting something we really want constitutes happiness. But why do we have to wait for so long when we can be happy now?

Delight in simple things.
Appreciate the little joys life showers you.
Be grateful.
Every single day.

Remember, you could always choose to be happy.

p.s. I'm really sorry this post sounds like a lecture. haha. I'm just talking to myself really.  Damn, I forgot where I placed my comedy wand. :) 

7.10.10

Rainy Days

let me just say this, ok?
i am not okay.

you don't know how it feels like being in the cold and unfriendly side of the world with no family to turn to, no friends to help you laugh your troubles away, no boyfriend when you are in dire need of a hug, and no familiar place you can go to when you feel so sad and alone.

maybe these are all just in my mind or a consequence of thinking too much when you've got nothing else to do. believe me, i've been trying to cheer myself up. i am forcing myself not to think too much, directing my attention to things that have interested me before but to no avail.

i still feel so sad and alone.

i am lost without a cause.

unmotivated.

uninspired to become the best that i can be.

i think i am stuck in the pre-adulthood crisis, or so i think i am. it's like i am at this point in my life when i don't know which way to go, which road to take.

i've been praying to God, asking Him what He wants me to be and where in this world should He want me to serve. i want to know the reason for my existence. what on earth am i here for?

i have a lot of dreams for myself when i was younger. i wanted to become a missionary, a doctor, a chef, or a photojournalist. marrying the man i love, raising wonderful kids and having a simple yet a happy home are all part of the list too. but before i settle down i want to find myself first, be the woman that i ought to be so that i could completely and selflessly give myself to others. 

i used to think that my dreams and aspirations are enough to make me successful. then i realized that at some point in my life, i need to stop thinking about what i want and start thinking about how i could take part in God's marvelous plan for humankind.

i believe i am a step closer towards happiness and contentment though i still don't know for now where i'm heading. i am letting go of the plans and dreams i've made for myself. sometimes we need to let life unfold itself before our very eyes and decide on things when the right time comes.   

 i am young. i am smart. i am talented (i think). and most of all, i have the gift of FAITH and the capacity to LOVE.

everything will fall into place in due time.
just give me some time to figure out myself first.

5.10.10

Spin My Troubles Away


I hope it isn't as hard as doing the laundry.
hehe